How Not To Kill Your Office Plants Featureing Dead String Of Pearls

Ever considered adding a plant to your work or living space? We sure did. They enhanced our design scheme, purified our air, and reeled in countless compliments, but little did we know how incapable we were of keeping them alive… Read on for gore.

In a blink their leaves went from glossy and plump, to a shrivelled, lethargic skeleton. The tragedy was unforeseen, and we weren’t ready for it.

For those that dare to play with love’s wicked game, we’ve gathered five plant-keeping tips learned from our misfortune that will save you time, money, and heartbreak.

1. Baby steps

It’s obvious, but let's say it out loud - we all start as rookies. Caring for plants is a big responsibility, so beginning with low-maintenance greenery is a great way to learn the basics. Don’t just reach for the most exotic shrub, research before you buy. Choose a sturdy fend-for-themself type, that can survive days without water or sun. This way you can gain some experience before moving onto the more delicate of the plant kingdom.

Start with this list of the top 20 great indoor plants.

2. Location! Location! Location! 

Our first was a fern destined to add zing to our shadiest corner in the office. We are yet to find the culprit, but someone moved Fern (poor fella didn’t live long enough to get a decent name).  Instead of cool shade, Fern was found in direct sunlight - it’s leaves darkening, curling inwards away from the sun, twitching for a drop of water.

Evidently plants have specific lighting, temperature, and humidity survival requirements. Make sure you consider the location you’d like the plant to live before buying. Will there be direct sunlight? Is the temperature controlled by a homesick eskimo that demands frost?

3. Don’t forget

Most plants come with a tab sticking out from its soil. This is not just a barcode, it is the care instructions for your little guy's needs. Read them. Follow them. Repeat them. We failed at watering consistently, which turns out to be rather vital for survival. Hot tip: set up weekly reminders on your phone or calendar to water your plants as often as required. 

Dead String Of Pearls
Our First Casualty

4. Too much water can kill

Our beloved string of pearls, Naomi, hadn’t been fed for weeks. When we realised, we assumed she’d be starving, ravenous, hankering for a Nile River buffet. We learned the hard way that overwatering plants weakens their ability to defend themselves, making them susceptible to disease. Did you know they can also suffocate if their roots sit in water for too long? Horrifying. 

Naomi, we are so sorry.

Hot tip: keep your plant in a pot with draining holes to stop soil from becoming swampland. This way the roots can get all the oxygen they need.

5. Haircuts 

No shampooing or conditioning necessary. A plantcut shouldn’t take any longer than one minute, unless if you’d like to sit and chat about styles and latest trends. To give your plant a haircut, carefully remove the dead, damaged or diseased leaves. This allows your plant to focus its energy on maintaining its healthy leaves and growing new strong ones.

More than just a plant

We wish you the greatest success for the future of your plant keeping. But if you are to learn anything from the error of our ways, please let it be that plants require patience and care. Don’t water them after a two week drought and expect them to flourish. Then again... don’t put them through the pain of a two week drought. May your plants-to-be grow strong and thrive in the home you give them!

Posted on

Monday, September 23, 2019

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